About mwemaLaugh it out whenever you can! Keep Smiling
I admit it has taken me a while to figure out what my next post would be. I always prefer writing after I have read a book or two and I get down to sharing my views. I am on a brief break between semesters and in the last 3 days I decided to read all of Veronica Roth’s books. Well that was after I watched the movie Divergent. The Divergent books is a series of 3 books: The Divergent, The Insurgent and The Allegiant. In addition to these I also got to read Free Four and Four Divergent Stories: The Transfer, The Initiate, The Son and The Traitor. Those are quite a number of books and they did spur quite a bit of emotions within me and they got me thinking about my fears.
Well I could highlight a few parts from the books, the five factions for example, that split people based on their values that is Amity who value peace, Abnegation who value selflessness, Candor who value honesty, Dauntless who value bravery and the Erudite who value intelligence. I admire the dauntless most for their bravery, they get to jump off trains and climb buildings among other things.
During the Dauntless initiation ceremony, the initiates are required to face their fears and learn how to maneuver through them. I thought about it for a while and I knew that maybe my fear landscape would include little creepy insects, darkness and the death of a loved one. One thing I liked however was how Tobias, a character from the book always told Triss, to be brave each time before she went under the fear simulation. I realize that courage is a requirement as each of us face our fears. I have talked about facing fears in my last post, I however didn’t talk about the amount of courage and bravery it requires. I have resolved to always telling myself how brave I am, telling others to be brave while helping them to be brave. Sometimes a little faith in yourself and in others is all that is required. Sometimes it is the missing ingredient to our aspirations and in our ability to take risks.
As we speak, each day I am beginning to dare myself to take risks or make choices that I would otherwise have not made due to either complacency or well “my comfort zone”. This of course doesn’t include choices that would affect my health. I am daring myself to work on coding hours from 3 to 6 a day, I am daring myself to exercise at least an hour a day, I am daring myself to take less sugar and the hardest one of all, is putting myself out there without considering what someone else would think of me. I am becoming a better person and I loving this new and improved me. Sometimes this is what we need to become better. That’s a challenge I am posing to you too, learn to take a few challenges each day against your old self.
I only need to say it one more time, Be Brave and face your fears, don’t let them define you.
Here are a few quotes on Bravery and Fear from the Divergent series:
“We believe in ordinary acts of bravery, in the courage that drives one person to stand up for another.”
― Veronica Roth, Divergent
“Becoming fearless isn’t the point. That’s impossible. It’s learning how to control your fear, and how to be free from it.”
― Veronica Roth, Divergent
“I wonder if fears ever really go away, or if they just lose their power over us.”
― Veronica Roth, Allegiant
“A brave man acknowledges the strength of others.”
― Veronica Roth, Divergent
A Dauntless Initiate
There is always this one thing that stops each of us from achieving our full potential. You and I can all give an example of the times when we felt unsure of our every move. Something we could not define held us back. This is FEAR. There are various degrees of fear depending on the person experiencing it. Don’t get me wrong, there is a degree of fear that is healthy, I am referring to the kind that could leave you paralyzed and with so much self doubt, worry and low self esteem.
I am currently in my final year and several times I have found myself wondering What Next After School?
This is one of my fears and I am sure some of my colleagues in school are going through the same phase. I have talked to some of my friends in the tech field and I realized no matter how much advice I got, I am the only one who could get myself out of this situation. You may wonder, What have I resolved to do?
I am facing my fears each day. I this case, choosing to leave each day at a time, analyzing my deeds, enjoying what I do and picking up challenges that improve my skills as a developer. This hasn’t been easy especially, when all of a sudden you have to sleep for less hours and your code isn’t compiling with 103 errors. It can get disappointing I agree. I am learning to handle frustrations and I have to face my frustrations head on. For those who have watched, the animation, Avatar The Last Air Bender, I am learning Earth Bending!
I am Learning to FEEL the FEAR and DO IT ANYWAY!!
I mean what’s the worst that can happen??
This is a concept I learnt after reading Susan Jeffers book “Feel the Fear… and Do It Anyway”. She talks about fear, and moving from the zone of pain to power. Yes, fear makes you feel powerless and it is damn painful. This is why most people do not advance from their bad relationships or bad jobs. They would rather complain day in day out while in their comfort zone as compared to taking a risk at personal fulfillment and happiness.
She also points out the five truths about fear:
The fear will never go away as long as I continue to grow.
The only way to get rid of the fear of doing something is to go out and do it.
The only way to feel better about myself is to go out . . . and do it.
Not only am I going to experience fear whenever I’m on unfamiliar territory, so is everyone else.
Pushing through fear is less frightening than living with the underlying fear that comes from a feeling of helplessness.
It is also important to know that you are not the only one going through fear, each person does, but what we do to handle this fear is what sets us apart from each other.
I have made the choice to be happy, to do me and to do what I enjoy, no matter what. I can’t give up, I wasn’t born to. You should try this too!
No matter what life brings at me, I’ll handle it.
Go out and Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway!!
The Earth Bender