← Back home1 Comment so far

Six Ways To Win People To Your Way Of Thinking

Scribbled by on .

. . .

Well we all had a moment in our lives where we wanted to be the coolest kid in the group way back in primary or for some even secondary probably even university(particularly ladies), and yes some of us achieved this misconcieved status quo and gained nothing while others their ego and pride was probably boosted or satisfied to say the least. Of course no one was given the manual on how to do this, this all happened sub-consciously, we all know how awesome it feels when we manage to convince anyone to sway our way, be it business, pleasure or general encounters, but this is for those who have failed to master this art and for those who feel like that this isnt new to them, lets assume you’ll learn something new.

1. Avoid arguements

You can’t win an argument. You can’t because if you lose it, you lose it, and if you win it, you lose it. Why? Well, suppose you triumph over the other man/woman and shoot his argument full of holes and prove that he is “non compos mentis”. Then what? You will feel fine. But what about him? You have made him feel inferior. You have hurt his pride. He will resent your triumph.

Don’t argue with your customer or your spouse or your adversary. Don’t tell them they are wrong, don’t get them stirred up. Use a little diplomacy.

Show respect for the other person’s opinions.

2.Always accept fault

Never say to the other person, “You’re wrong!”. If you are the one on the wrong, admit it.

When we are right, let’s try to win people gently and tactfully to our way of thinking, and when we are wrong – and that will be surprisingly often, let’s be honest with ourselves – let’s admit our mistakes quickly and with enthusiasm. Not only will this simple technique produce astonishing results; but, believe it or not, it is a lot more fun than trying to defend oneself.

Remember the old famous proverb: “By fighting you never get enough, but by yielding you get more than you expected.”

3. Don’t be rude, always be friendly

Being kind and friendly can be greatly rewarding. Although at times we encounter rude and arrogant people, we may be  compelled  to snapping and this may interfere with progress of a lucrative deal. The best thing in a such a situation is to quell the person with tranquil actions. Buddhist teachings tell us that:

Hatred and aversion, like their opposites desire and greed, all spring from a fundamental ignorance.

That ignorance is our mistaken notion of our own permanent, independent existence. In ignorance, we see ourselves as separate beings, selfish,  unconnected with others. Blinded to our true state of interdependence and interconnectedness. It is this basic ignorance that keeps us divided. A peaceful, friendly mindset is the fastest highway for building networks, exploring ideas and formation of core units in any setting, whether with the family, colleagues at work or dealing with clients.

4.The Safety Gauge in handling complaints

Most people trying to win others to their way of thinking often do too much talking themselves. Give the other person a chance to speak out their mind. They know more about their business and problems than you do. So ask them questions, let them tell you a few things, and pick what you need from the conversation. If you disagree with them you may be tempted to interrupt, don’t! It is dangerous. They won’t pay attention to you while they still have a lot of ideas of their own crying for expression. So listen patiently and with an open mind. Be sincere about it.

Encourage them to express their ideas fully. Not sure if this works? Why not give a shot!

5.Always be a team player

Don’t you have much more faith in ideas that you discover for yourself than in ideas that are handed to you on a silver platter? If so, isn’t it bad judgment to try to ram your opinions down the throats of other people? Isn’t it wiser to make suggestions – and let the other person think out the conclusion? Always put yourself in a co-operative state of mind, not always thinking via your perspective but also via your opponents perspective. This levels the playground and opens doors for more ideas to be discussed.

6.Dramatize your ideas

Movies, don’t we all  love them? The drama, the mystery and most times the action gets the better of us. Of course we do love them but most of us   forget that we learn so much from them. I discovered that if you want people to  be fully attentive to you, one has to be dramatic, period. Remember what happened the last time you shook a rattle or a flashy a toy in front of an infant to stop them from crying? Well, human beings, much like babies, are easily distracted by moving objects or perhaps bright objects. Managers like Charts and Graphs much like Designers like Color and typography, lets put ourselves in a professional perspective, say an interview with a big company, think about how to dramatize in such a situation? Of course most times when being questioned we’re all  nervous, but we forget that were talking to a mere human being.  All you have to do is relax, and with the uttermost composure when asked to describe yourself, give a brief story or past experience whether good or bad, in a self expressive way,  trust me, this is an ultimate ice breaker, everybody has an interesting story, thus with intrigue you can easily convince anyone about anything.